Finance

Should I Sue My Financially Toxic Ex-Boyfriend for $100K?

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Pricey Penny,

Is it value my effort and time to take my former boyfriend/roommate to small-claims court docket? 

We met in 2008. In 2010, his restaurant closed. He moved in with me, saying he might get one other job wherever. I relented. He moved into my house and had 20-plus jobs in 5 years. 

I instructed him NUMEROUS occasions to maneuver out. I wanted assist with the mortgage and utilities, however I ended up dropping my house. I bought some jewellery so we might transfer again to his hometown, the place the price of residing was much less. 

He stated it was his flip to deal with me. He had many contacts and stated I solely wanted a part-time job for private spending cash. Within the first six months, he misplaced or stop seven completely different jobs. 

I acquired a part-time job and tried to hoard the cash I had. He requested how a lot I had left and advised I get a second job. He did chores round the home however did not contribute financially. 

After two years, he lastly moved out, however 14 months later, he was again. I broke my hip, so he moved himself again in (to deal with the canine). After he stop ANOTHER job, I instructed him to go away. He refused, on account of our state legal guidelines, he had squatters’ rights. 

I couldn’t afford legal professionals to get him out. Fourteen months in the past, he lastly moved out. I really feel he nonetheless owes me over $100,000. What do you recommend? 

-Used and Abused

Pricey Used,

If my scorecard is correct, your ex-boyfriend misplaced or stop at the very least 28 jobs throughout your time collectively and has a very poor monitor report of economic contributions. What are the chances that he’s turned his life round and is now gainfully employed with respectable financial savings? Or do you suppose he’s moved on as a result of he discovered another person he can mooch off of?

I’d like to inform you to sue the person for each cent he owes you. However I can’t think about a state of affairs the place it’s value your time and power.


For starters, when you actually suppose he owes you $100,000, you wouldn’t be capable of sue in small-claims court docket. The boundaries vary from $2,500 to $25,000 relying on the state. Meaning you’d want to rent an legal professional except you opted to go the DIY route, which is all the time ill-advised.

Even when you had essentially the most hermetic case in opposition to your boyfriend — as an illustration, when you made him signal a contract when he moved in and have sound documentation that reveals he violated it — a judgment is nugatory when somebody can’t pay up. In case your ex-boyfriend have been a accountable grownup, it is likely to be attainable to get an order that means that you can garnish his wages or his financial institution accounts. However in his case, there’s in all probability little if something to garnish.

So except your ex has some secret supply of wealth you uncared for to say, suing this leech in all probability isn’t value it. You’ll save your self money and time. You’ll keep away from the necessity to contact him. Take consolation, when you can, in understanding that you just’re not giving him any opening into your life ever once more as you deal with rebuilding your financial savings and credit score.

As you’re employed to regain your monetary footing, take into consideration the very pricey classes you’ve realized and the way you may apply them to a future relationship. For instance, it’s all the time sensible to place each names on the lease earlier than you progress in collectively. Signing a cohabitation settlement that spells out who’s liable for what payments can also be good.

Transferring on is the very best factor you are able to do right here. Your former boyfriend isn’t going to make you financially entire once more. Solely you are able to do that.

Listed below are 5 cash secrets and techniques that may provide help to cease wasting your funds and get your funds again on monitor.

Robin Hartill is an authorized monetary planner and a senior author at The BaghdadTime. Ship your difficult cash inquiries to [email protected].


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